Jeslyn Chua Xuan Hui
Young Women Division
I started chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo since I was in preschool and with the encouragement and support of my family, regularly participate in Soka Gakkai Singapore (SGS) activities as well as contribute to the Members Contribution Fund with my own pocket money.
Life had been smooth sailing for me and I had never obtained grades below my satisfaction until my GCE O-Level examinations. It was highly competitive to enter a junior college. I was fixated on and overwhelmed by the grades so needed to enter my desired course, I started to doubt my abilities to achieve the results needed. Doubts, fear and anxiety clouded my prayers. During the examination period, my confidence plunged even further when I could not tackle some of the questions. I chanted less with the perception that the end results were fixed and nothing could be done. Eventually, I scored below average in my school and could not enter the junior college (JC) of my choice. I felt my prayers were not answered, and was lost and confused at that moment. I started looking at polytechnic courses but realised my results would not allow me to enter the courses I like.
Thankfully, my family offered me advice and encouraged me to challenge myself based on faith once again so that I may use my experience as a spur to who would face similar challenges in the future.
Ikeda Sensei says, “Happiness in life does not depend on how well things go in your youth. And no matter how many mistakes you make, you always have a second chance.” (Discussions on Youth, “Youth: A Time of Challenge”, p. 27)
I returned back to faith and my studies with renewed determination, with the conviction that my prayers would lead me to a JC that suited me most and all the teachers would be my protective functions of the universe. I was eventually posted to a neighbourhood JC but it was near my house, hence enabling me to have more time for daimoku and study.
When I started my JC life in 2021, I dedicated myself to my studies and Buddhist practice, practising in exact accord as what my mentor Ikeda Sensei teaches. I studied doubly hard, went to the school library to watch the lectures and completed my tutorials diligently every day. I clarified all my doubts with my teachers and took full responsibility for my learning. As a Buddhist practitioner, besides chanting
Nam-myoho-renge-kyo daily, I shared Buddhism with my friends and invited them to SGS activities. I also tapped on testimony books in my efforts to share Buddhism with them.
During my GCE A-Level examinations, I encountered various obstacles such as having a bacterial infection in my eyelid, and disrupted sleep when my room’s air conditioner broke down. However, I felt that with faith and practice firmly rooted in my life, I was in a life condition that could not be affected by external circumstances. I was firm and resolute and confident in the efforts I had put in unlike what I experienced two years ago.
On December 14 last year, I received an early admission invitation from Nanyang Technology University(NTU). I submitted my application and within a month, received the good news of being accepted into NTU for my first choice of Bachelor of Science in Biological Science with Second Major in Medicinal Chemistry and Pharmacology. This was the exact course that I had hoped to enter since secondary school. I realised that everything had happened for a reason and I was protected and supported in many ways. My school teachers and career advisory mentor had written very good testimonials for me, elevating my chance of a successful early admission. Early admission to the university is only offered to the top 5-10% of the cohort in the JC, and should I have gone to a more competitive JC, I might not have the chance to get a placement in NTU without the GCE A-Level examination results. How things had turned out truly were beyond my imagination.
I have learnt through these experiences the importance of holding on to hope and faith and continuously planting the causes for future successes. Ikeda Sensei says, “Even if things don’t go the way you’d hoped, never give up. That’s the mark of a true victor.” (On Our Shared Journey for Kosen-rufu , “Win the Present Moment and Set an Example for Future Generations”) Holding these words by Ikeda Sensei close to my heart, I am determined to become a person who can contribute to the society through my work and efforts in expanding our network of kosen-rufu.
(Adapted from December 2023 issue of Creative Times)
